E3 is over. Actually, it’s still going on today, but I only stayed two days again this year. Just like last year, at the beginning of the first day I thought “Wow, there’s no way I’m going to be able to see everything I want in just two days.” But then towards the end of the second day I think “Wow, I’m so sick of this and I’ve seen everything I want.” I mean, I’d still like to get more behind-closed-door demonstrations of games and I’d like to get more actual play time with some of the games on the showroom floor, but I don’t have the energy or patience for either at this point. So see ya next year, E3.
Funny E3 story for the day:
Around 5:00 yesterday I’m cutting through the outdoor walkway en route to my last appointment of the show. My feet hurt from 2 days of almost constant walking and standing. I mean they ache from my heels all the way up to the top of my calves. Halfway to my destination, I notice a booth with signs saying just “Ouch!”. The signs themselves seemed to be filled with some kind of pills. Here, here’s a pic:
|
She’s not in this picture because I went back and snapped it later at closing time, but staffing the booth at the time was a woman –a typical E3 booth model with a huge chest and too-blonde hair. I didn’t really notice her, though. Partially because I’d seen dozens just like her by that point, but mainly because of what she was holding in her hand and offering to all passers-by: sample packets of Tylenol. Feeling the ache in my legs renew, I walked straight over, pointed at what she was holding, smiled at her, and said “Man, I sure would love a couple of those.”
She had seen me coming, but she looked kind of surprised when I spoke and gave me a look like she was trying to figure me out. This threw me off until I suddenly realized that between the time I had pointed my finger at the Tylenol packets she was holding and looked up at her face to make contact, she had moved her hands. I had said what I said while pointing directly at her unnaturally large breasts.
My mind kind of locked for a second while I tried to think of a follow-up that wouldn’t dig myself deeper, but thankfully she got what I meant and decided that I wasn’t dropping some awful line on her. She smiled back and said “Feet hurt, huh?” as she passed me a couple of Tylenol packets.
Funny thing is, I never even had a chance to take the pills, rushed as I was and lacking anything to wash them down. I still have them, and they’re probably the best schwag I walked away with.
Speaking of schwag, I once again succeeded by walking away with as little of it as possible. You can always spot an E3 newbie by looking for the people completely overburdened by tee shirts, inflatable swords, keychains, press kits, mouse pads, balls, and pamphlets. Every year I see people make fools out of themselves for the sake of a black tee shirt riddled with company logos. Or else they’re waiting hours in line just to get an inflatable plastic ball with more company logos on it. This stuff not only weighs you down in an otherwise tiring gauntlet of dashing between appointments, but you get home and realize that with few exceptions it’s all a bunch of crap that just takes up space. And the only time they wear those tee shirts is at next year’s E3 when they want to show how hardcore they are while waiting in line to get more tee shirts.
This year my schwag take consisted of the following:
- One tee shirt for the Alan Wake game (given to me by my PR contact; would have been rude to refuse)
- A poster for some World War II game (again, handed to me by my PR contact)
- A badge holder (picked up to replace the crappy one I got when registering)
- A Myst 5 mouse pad signed by the game’s lead developer (that’s kind of cool, actually)
- A copy of Magic the Gathering: Online (looked valuable, maybe I can sell it on eBay)
- A playable demo disk for Sly Cooper: Honor Among Thieves for the PS2 (definitely glad to get this)
- Two sample packs for Extra Strength Tylenol (see above)
Not bad. I could have done a lot worse and gotten a lot more.
So that’s it for another year. This was my 6th E3 convention, and I hope to be back again next year. I had considered myself a veteran last year, but my friend Sluggo taught me something new this year: how to use the L.A. Convention Center’s back hallways. These are the halls that convention center staff use to transport equipment, food, and other items around without having to cut through the crowds. They save MASSIVE amounts of time and frustration by completely circumventing the gawkers and idiot cell phone users who decide to suddenly stand still in the middle of a stream of people. I think the halls are supposed to be off limits to non-employees, it’s surprising how few people will give a crap if you just act like you belong there.
I’ll wrap up my E3 coverage tomorrow by posting some of the many photographs I took. Some great stuff in there.
Published by