The Crying Massively Multiplayer Game

Right, so as I’ve mentioned and as I’m sure Geralyn will grumble about if you ask her, I’ve been playing a lot of World of Warcraft lately. Short description of the game: You role-play, on your computer, fantasy themed characters with thousands of other people around the world. I’ve been experimenting a lot with different classes to see which I like best and to relieve the boredom that seems to set in around level 20. So far I’ve played a druid, a rogue, a paladin, a warlock, and most recently a mage.

I like the mage, but something weird has happened. For variety’s sake, I made this character using the human female avatar. Here’s a screenshot:

As you can see, she’s um …built. But apparently Blizzard knows what its customers want, because that’s pretty much the only way she comes.

At any rate, the really weird thing is that when I play with this character, I’m constantly being hit on by other players. It’s creepy. They say stuff like “Hey, hot stuff, how’s it going?” Or they use the “/flirt” and “/kiss” commands. Or they just give me free stuff. Actually, the last one isn’t so bad, as I have a pretty good supply of potions as a result. And I finally know what it’s like to be a pretty little girl. …Who can throw fireballs and turn people into sheep.

The flirting thing baffles me in a lot of ways, because those other players must know that there’s a really good chance that I’m a dude, no matter what I look like in-game. While there are some women players, the vast, vast majority are guys. And since there are a lot of female avatars running around, a few whacks with the logic stick should lead you to the conclusion that you’re not really flirting with a hot chick any more than you’re really slaying that dragon. But people either don’t understand this or don’t care. Either of which is kind of off but to my credit I either ignore them or say “I’m a guy, Captain Stupid.”

Anyway, you’ll find Sanza the Human mage on the Uther server, spamming the Trade channels with “WILL CYBER 4 STACKS OF COARSE STONE!! MEET U OUTSIDE IRONFORGE AUCTION HOUSE!!!”

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